It looks like Game of Thrones is finally back in full swing with an episode that brought us long-awaited reunions, scheming battle tactics and sociopathic murder – all with barely a drop of bloodshed.
The third season 7 offering, ‘The Queen’s Justice’, aired in the early hours of Monday morning (July 31) and proved once again that Game of Thrones is much more than just a nudey-fest with swords.
Surprisingly, the real shocker was not what fans had anticipated. Since day one of the new season we’ve been waiting for our favourite bastard Jon Snow to meet The Mother of Dragons, yet their eventual rendezvous fell somewhat short of expectations.
While it was great to finally see the young revolutionaries finally brought together at Dragonstone, their awkward bickering was more ‘water and smoke’ than ‘ice and fire’. This relationship is definitely a grower.
Refusing to bend the knee, Jon did receive an apology from Daenerys for her father’s atrocities, although she is not yet convinced of the threat of the White Walkers and refuses to indulge Jon’s sulky pleas for assistance.
Even Jon seems to be getting tired of hearing himself blather on about the army of the dead, but as Tyrion so eloquently put it during his and Jon’s cliff-top brood-off; “People’s minds aren’t made for problems that large…it’s almost a relief to confront a comfortable, familiar monster like my sister.”
Daenerys does eventually agree to let Jon mine Dragonglass on her island in the hopes that it’ll help soften him towards her cause, but it’s going to take a little more to spark off this potentially ground-breaking union.
Jon and Dany’s so-so meeting may have paled in comparison to the rest of the episode, but that quickly became irrelevant when Euron Greyjoy made a triumphant return to King’s Landing with Yara Greyjoy, Ellaria Sand and daughter Tyene in tow.
On the verge of imploding with ego, Euron gleefully presents the hostages to Cersei – and an opportunity to avenge her daughter Myrcella’s death along with them.
A pretty chuffed Cersei (a woman notoriously hard to please) is clearly turned on by the crazed pirate and their mutual disregard for human life.
It would be wrong not to mention Euron and Jaime’s super-cringe exchange during all of this. It’s becoming less of a secret and more common knowledge that the Queen and her brother are a long-term item, and Euron seized the opportunity to ask Jaime about his sister’s sexual proclivities, more specifically whether she enjoyed “a finger in the bum”. Jaime’s face = priceless.
But the highlight of the episode was most definitely Cersei’s horrifying revenge on Ellaria Sand, the woman who callously poisoned innocent Myrcella Baratheon after the Lannisters bust open her lover’s skull (RIP Oberyn). Have these characters not learned yet that an eye for an eye eventually makes the whole world blind?
We all waited with baited breath to find out which gruesome end the Queen had planned for Ellaria, and I admit I was expecting something on the level of the Saw movies in terms of brutality.
However, Game of Thrones writers threw us off once again with a bloodless, but nonetheless spine-chilling, exaction of the Queen’s justice: After poisoning Ellaria’s daughter, she condemned her to spending the rest of her days looking at her child’s rotting corpse. Props to Indira Varma here (who played Ellaria) – her acting was exceptional.
The episode was also littered with references to the ‘Game’ on a larger scale, with Cersei meeting with a representative of the Iron Bank and rightly noting that “Gold wins wars”, as well as Little Finger’s advice to Sansa about living as though life were a constant battle that is never won, but simply played.
These underlying truths will no doubt become more relevant as the rest of the season plays out: The war against the army of the dead will likely render much of this throne-grappling futile, while the younger generation of characters should come to realise that the battle for power is an endless one – and attempt to revolutionize the system as a result. Here’s hoping.
Of these younger characters, Bran Stark is set to play a huge role, although it’s still pretty vague which form this will take given his spaced-out, obscure comments alluding to things we don’t fully understand.
Aside from that, it was touching to see him reunited with his sister Sansa at Winterfell this week. Less touching were his weird comments about seeing her marry the odious Ramsay Bolton in a vision, a night she’d clearly rather forget. After declaring himself the Three Eyed Raven, not the Lord of Winterfell, it’s clear Bran has his sights set beyond current events – him and Jon are going to have a ball chatting about the White Walkers together.
Meanwhile, Ser Jorah has been miraculously cured by Sam at the Citadel and is now free to mope around after Daenerys again.
Melisandre foretells both her and Varys’s death in Westeros after he advises her not to return and the notion of his own mortality seems to unnerve him. But, as we know, all men must die.
Concluding the episode, Daenerys’ army take yet another hit and Tyrion Lannister is outsmarted at Casterly Rock. Impregnating the fortress via a secret passageway Tyrion once used for smuggling in lady friends, the Unsullied are shocked to find an absence of Lannister soldiers. Enter Euron Greyjoy once again to crash the party and destroy their entire fleet. That damned, crazy sea-demon.
Jaime, on the other hand, has taken the Lannister soldiers to High Garden where the Tyrell’s quickly surrender. Offering perhaps the most dignified death of the entire series, Jaime allows Lady Olenna a painless suicide by poisoning which she gladly accepts…but not before confessing to the murder of Joffrey Baratheon and telling him to let Cersei know it was her. Drawing blood right to the very end, we’ll miss our favourite Tyrell’s silver tongued put-downs and fantastic game playing.
All in all, this was a meatier Game of Thrones episode that pulled us into the action without a need for blood and guts. If previous seasons are anything to go by, they are simply building up the drama and we could be in for some epic battle scenes and more surprises in the coming episodes.
Catch the next episode of Game of Thrones season 7 on Sunday at 9pm BST on Sky Atlantic.
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